Friday, June 26, 2009
Celery is, by FAR, the
Celery is, by FAR, the worst substance on this planet. The color, texture, taste and especially the SMELL of it make me want to curl up and die.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
YYYYEAAAAAHHHHHH
I just saw Transformers 2.
I have a whole hell of a lot to say about Transformers and the movies, my prior blog is known exclusively for an extensive post in whcih I talked about it.
But I'm gonna do something I don't usually do and keep it short.
Transformers 2 is a fucking awesome movie.
I don't normally like to curse on my blog but god freaking damnit was this movie awesome.
Listen. If you want to see anything, anything other than giant fucking robots literally tearing each other apart while the world ends in the background, you have no reason to see this.
But if you like that sort of thing, E.G. you are a person I would ever want to talk to, go see this, don't try to make it some serious artistic bullcrap and you will have a shitload of fun.
I will see this again. Absolutely. IMAX next, please.
Fucking SOLD.
I have a whole hell of a lot to say about Transformers and the movies, my prior blog is known exclusively for an extensive post in whcih I talked about it.
But I'm gonna do something I don't usually do and keep it short.
Transformers 2 is a fucking awesome movie.
I don't normally like to curse on my blog but god freaking damnit was this movie awesome.
Listen. If you want to see anything, anything other than giant fucking robots literally tearing each other apart while the world ends in the background, you have no reason to see this.
But if you like that sort of thing, E.G. you are a person I would ever want to talk to, go see this, don't try to make it some serious artistic bullcrap and you will have a shitload of fun.
I will see this again. Absolutely. IMAX next, please.
Fucking SOLD.
More Like Bombic Am I Right
Hello, readers. Have you been enjoying my mobile blogs? I find them to be oddly profound reading them now. They actually take me a long time to do because I only have 160 characters and I need them to retain punctuation and grammar. It's a pretty good writing excersize, actually.
So, I believe I have mentioned before I draw a crappy little manga in my spare time. It's not something I usually exhibit much because it's not something I think I'm particularly good at, as opposed to my writing which I think is at least pretty okay. Which isn't to say that I'm a bad artist, just that it's not my best skill.
Well spare time for me comes almost exclusively after 10PM now and for whatever reason I have been drawing quite a lot. And to make a long story short, I've been really working hard on getting my manga skills to level up to the point where, say, I wouldn't be embarrassed to show you guys.
Well shame is for people who aren't whoring themselves out on the internet so here you go, readers:
http://www.shakytable.com/sterilecomic/
I have just spent the night attempting to make the site look pretty. If you're into shounen-type manga (Bleach, Naruto, anything where people fight a lot) then maybe this will be up your alley.
If not, then you can just leave me glowing nonspecific praise and I'll pretend it's genuine. I'm actually not that picky.
So, I believe I have mentioned before I draw a crappy little manga in my spare time. It's not something I usually exhibit much because it's not something I think I'm particularly good at, as opposed to my writing which I think is at least pretty okay. Which isn't to say that I'm a bad artist, just that it's not my best skill.
Well spare time for me comes almost exclusively after 10PM now and for whatever reason I have been drawing quite a lot. And to make a long story short, I've been really working hard on getting my manga skills to level up to the point where, say, I wouldn't be embarrassed to show you guys.
Well shame is for people who aren't whoring themselves out on the internet so here you go, readers:
http://www.shakytable.com/sterilecomic/
I have just spent the night attempting to make the site look pretty. If you're into shounen-type manga (Bleach, Naruto, anything where people fight a lot) then maybe this will be up your alley.
If not, then you can just leave me glowing nonspecific praise and I'll pretend it's genuine. I'm actually not that picky.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
I was told last week
I was told last week that when I'm behind the counter at work I pace like a tiger in a cage. I have since found it to be true in much of my life.
Friday, June 19, 2009
My dad let me leave
My dad let me leave work and go to a carnival! Theres a million people here, but it seems mostly alright. Blogging by text is limiting but poetic
Thursday, June 18, 2009
The future is here, readers.
The future is here, readers. I am writing this from my phone, which means that I can make your life better from anywhere!
What times we live in.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Twix PB Is The Best Candy Ever Made
Twix PB is the Best Candy Ever Made
an essay by Phil
Twix PB is the best candy ever made. While candy can normally only be judged according to individual taste and biological diversity makes comparing them on any real concrete basis impossible, it is actually Twix PB that is unequivocally the best candy ever made.
Twix PB is like regular Twix except there's peanut butter instead of caramel and a chocolate cookie instead of a non-chocolate cookie. Twix is an okay candy but the PB version is basically the candy equivalent of the Garden of Eden. In fact I would not be surprised if there were goddamn Twix PB growing on the tree of life, in which case Adam and Eve can't really be blamed because Twix PB is the best candy ever made.
There is actually another candy that I used to believe was the best candy ever made. It was Reverse Reese's, which were like regular Reese's but with peanut butter on the outside and chocolate on the inside. They would only release them at Halloween and I had what might be called an "issue" with eating way too many all the time.
Did you know that Twix PB can be enjoyed in a variety of locations and events?
Twix PB are perfect for:
A picnic
A ballgame
The beach
On a boat
In your house
In another person's house
At school
During your break
During when you should be working
In space
At a funeral
In a cave
In a fire
On a plane
On a train
On clean clothes
Or on a stain
In the ocean
In a park
In an anthill
Riding a shark
In the womb
During Memorial Day
In a seedy motel
In a five star hotel
During a trial
At a Miley Cyrus concert
Four hundred thousand years in the past
At the bank
The battle of Pelenor field
Stealing a flatscreen TV
Programming an artificial intelligence
Bungee jumping off of Mt. Fuji
Drinking a soda
In Mexico
In the center of the Earth
During a domino competition
And wherever fun times are had!
In conclusion, Twix PB is the best candy ever made.
an essay by Phil
Twix PB is the best candy ever made. While candy can normally only be judged according to individual taste and biological diversity makes comparing them on any real concrete basis impossible, it is actually Twix PB that is unequivocally the best candy ever made.
Twix PB is like regular Twix except there's peanut butter instead of caramel and a chocolate cookie instead of a non-chocolate cookie. Twix is an okay candy but the PB version is basically the candy equivalent of the Garden of Eden. In fact I would not be surprised if there were goddamn Twix PB growing on the tree of life, in which case Adam and Eve can't really be blamed because Twix PB is the best candy ever made.
There is actually another candy that I used to believe was the best candy ever made. It was Reverse Reese's, which were like regular Reese's but with peanut butter on the outside and chocolate on the inside. They would only release them at Halloween and I had what might be called an "issue" with eating way too many all the time.
Did you know that Twix PB can be enjoyed in a variety of locations and events?
Twix PB are perfect for:
A picnic
A ballgame
The beach
On a boat
In your house
In another person's house
At school
During your break
During when you should be working
In space
At a funeral
In a cave
In a fire
On a plane
On a train
On clean clothes
Or on a stain
In the ocean
In a park
In an anthill
Riding a shark
In the womb
During Memorial Day
In a seedy motel
In a five star hotel
During a trial
At a Miley Cyrus concert
Four hundred thousand years in the past
At the bank
The battle of Pelenor field
Stealing a flatscreen TV
Programming an artificial intelligence
Bungee jumping off of Mt. Fuji
Drinking a soda
In Mexico
In the center of the Earth
During a domino competition
And wherever fun times are had!
In conclusion, Twix PB is the best candy ever made.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Can't Believe I Almost Forgot This
Today I passed a Jamaican restaurant, whose name was
wait for it
The Jerk Center
It made my week.
wait for it
The Jerk Center
It made my week.
A Joke I Heard Today
Courtesy of Lambros, one of the funniest men I have ever met (in a uniquely Greek way, which makes him even cooler). This is, of course, translated, but happens to work perfectly regardless of language so here we go.
A man walks into a bar. On the counter, he sees a small bin with money in it.
So he asks the bartender what's up, and he says that they're running a contest. Whoever can complete three tasks gets everything in there.
Well, being the adventurous type the man asks what the tasks are.
First, he is told, you have to drink an entire bottle of Tequila.
Second, you have to go to the junkyard down the street and pull the loose tooth from a pitbull there.
Third, you have to go upstairs and have sex with the 84 year old woman who lives in one of the apartments.
This proves to be too much, so the man declines. He orders a drink, and ends up staying for a while. Four or five drinks in, he's starting to feel brave, so he says, "You know what? I'll do it. Bring out the bottle."
He tackles the bottle of tequila with zeal and gusto, which combined with his other drinks leaves him a right hot mess. However, with his eye on the money he stumbles out of the bar to go deal with the dog.
About half an hour later he comes back in. His clothes are torn, he's got blood all over, and just generally looks like a mess.
"Okay," he says, "now where's the old lady whose tooth I have to take out again?"
A man walks into a bar. On the counter, he sees a small bin with money in it.
So he asks the bartender what's up, and he says that they're running a contest. Whoever can complete three tasks gets everything in there.
Well, being the adventurous type the man asks what the tasks are.
First, he is told, you have to drink an entire bottle of Tequila.
Second, you have to go to the junkyard down the street and pull the loose tooth from a pitbull there.
Third, you have to go upstairs and have sex with the 84 year old woman who lives in one of the apartments.
This proves to be too much, so the man declines. He orders a drink, and ends up staying for a while. Four or five drinks in, he's starting to feel brave, so he says, "You know what? I'll do it. Bring out the bottle."
He tackles the bottle of tequila with zeal and gusto, which combined with his other drinks leaves him a right hot mess. However, with his eye on the money he stumbles out of the bar to go deal with the dog.
About half an hour later he comes back in. His clothes are torn, he's got blood all over, and just generally looks like a mess.
"Okay," he says, "now where's the old lady whose tooth I have to take out again?"
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Man it's goddamn hot
Readers!
How are you?
This blog is coming to you from several hours south of where most of you live. I am in Florida for a few days, an all-too-rare vacation. I am currently stealing internet from some bloke named Jeff, assuming he didn't name his network after someone hypothetical that he imagined owns his internet. In such a case I suppose we're both beyond help.
Having said that, Jeff, I'm sorry for siphoning your netz and I hope I'm doing it in such a manner that you are not inconvenienced or preferably even aware, and if it makes you feel any better the signal is so weak and intermittant that every time I click on a website I do a tribal dance to encourage the god of the internetz to bless me with an actual loading.
Part of me likes not knowing if I'll be able to do anything moment to moment. It's kind of exciting in an intensely irritating way.
What have I been doing, you ask?
Sleeping. I have been sleeping all the goddamn time. I have been sleeping so often I'm not even entirely certain the parts inbetween are real and maybe I'm just in a goddamn coma back in Simsbury. I'm not a sleeper really, I guess my body is taking this chance to make up for how terribly I treat it.
The other thing I've been doing a lot is reading Russell Brand's autobiography, which I bought in the airport book store because I needed something to read and he has a rather funny look about him and he's pretty funny and the book promised to be mostly about sex and drugs, and I'm currently writing a story in which both are pretty important but as I have never done one and don't do nearly as much as I'd like of the other I figured it'd be nice.
The thing about autobiographies is that it's kind of an asshole thing to do. I realize that writing that sentence in my goddamn blog is really hypocritical but there's a huge difference between some twit writing about the O.C. on the internet and someone who has published a real live book. Honestly I think most people have lead interesting lives and their stories are probably really good but when I was looking at the little autobiography section they had set up all I could think about was how little I wanted to know about any of these people trying to tell me to pay for the privelege of telling me about themselves.
Anyway looking for novels stresses me out so I got Russell Brand's autobiography and it's really good. It's written in colloquial British and it turns out he's actually a really good writer, and has led a hell of an interesting life. I've been devouring the thing, I've read 226 pages since yesterday morning when I got it. I love UK slang with a burning passion, and also there's lots of unbelievable stories and a tutor sticking his finger up Russell's bum when he got an answer right so he stopped going. Being engrossed in the language is taking its toll, last night I started thinking in goddamn British before I fell asleep.
It makes me feel terribly boring though, not necessarily because I don't do heroin (although let's be honest how interesting would that make me in context) but because I'd love to have people paying to read about me but I don't think an entire chapter on how I get debilitatingly nervous in the self-checkout line when someone is behind me is really something people are going to pay money for.
I've had about a thousand things that I thought would make excellent blog posts but I can't remember most of them. I see where a twitter-like thing on my phone would be useful in these cases but I don't think people are going to read four paragraph twits on how I find my American and European sensibilities in constant combat, and probably it only lets you type a few lines at a time anyway.
Here is part of a conversation that describes where I am and what I did today:
davidlinc1: where are you like miami
Suppai no Iruka: New Port Richey
Suppai no Iruka: It's near Tampa
davidlinc1: that sounds maine-y
Suppai no Iruka: And Tarpon Springs, where the first Greeks came to america to fish for sponges
Suppai no Iruka: That's not even a little bit a joke
davidlinc1: wow
Suppai no Iruka: The place is fucking crazy with sponges
davidlinc1: well what use DON'T greeks have for sea sponge
Suppai no Iruka: Like A: anyone uses natural sponges
Suppai no Iruka: And B: anyone wants them associated with our fucking culture
Suppai no Iruka: Also we went to disney toda
Suppai no Iruka: well Epcot
Suppai no Iruka: Disney's geeky older brother
davidlinc1: LOL
Suppai no Iruka: He's in college and he's gonna have a great career but
Suppai no Iruka: You're already getting more sex than him and you're in 8th grade
davidlinc1: LOOOOOOL
Suppai no Iruka: Actually it was pretty sweet
Suppai no Iruka: I saw Snow White in Germany
Suppai no Iruka: so
davidlinc1: snow white in ger-
Suppai no Iruka: Yeah
davidlinc1: what
Suppai no Iruka: I was eating bratwurst at the time
davidlinc1: I love bratwurst
davidlinc1: where they take a brat
davidlinc1: then cook the worst of it
davidlinc1: and the brat learns to be good
davidlinc1: .......................................
Actually I should apologize to this young girl, she kept screaming that Snow White was there but I couldn't damn well see her and it's dangerous for princesses to be walking out in the open that far from the Magic Kingdom so I dismissed her and while I didn't think anything particularly rude at her she was totally right and I was wrong and apparently blind but I had been up for like 6 hours and hadn't yet eaten.
Also I have to say Disney is a place where you can open your eyes and at any moment at all pick out the happiest and most depressed children in the world. It's kind of disconcerting how many miserable kids I noticed, even in proportion to all the families making magic memories and stuff.
Well there you are, readers, and that's a post you can take to the goddamn bank, although I don't know that they'll actually give you anything for it. Right now it's roughly four thousand degrees and I am listening to a bloc party song on repeat and wondering if I should work on this story I started last night, the second set of drawings I've not even started on, or sleep even though it's only 12:30 and I slept for like 3 hours this afternoon.
I hope you're all doing well, and I shall be back on Thursday for any of you that wish to, as the kids are saying, "hit me up."
NOW BONCE OFF YA LITTLE WANKAH
How are you?
This blog is coming to you from several hours south of where most of you live. I am in Florida for a few days, an all-too-rare vacation. I am currently stealing internet from some bloke named Jeff, assuming he didn't name his network after someone hypothetical that he imagined owns his internet. In such a case I suppose we're both beyond help.
Having said that, Jeff, I'm sorry for siphoning your netz and I hope I'm doing it in such a manner that you are not inconvenienced or preferably even aware, and if it makes you feel any better the signal is so weak and intermittant that every time I click on a website I do a tribal dance to encourage the god of the internetz to bless me with an actual loading.
Part of me likes not knowing if I'll be able to do anything moment to moment. It's kind of exciting in an intensely irritating way.
What have I been doing, you ask?
Sleeping. I have been sleeping all the goddamn time. I have been sleeping so often I'm not even entirely certain the parts inbetween are real and maybe I'm just in a goddamn coma back in Simsbury. I'm not a sleeper really, I guess my body is taking this chance to make up for how terribly I treat it.
The other thing I've been doing a lot is reading Russell Brand's autobiography, which I bought in the airport book store because I needed something to read and he has a rather funny look about him and he's pretty funny and the book promised to be mostly about sex and drugs, and I'm currently writing a story in which both are pretty important but as I have never done one and don't do nearly as much as I'd like of the other I figured it'd be nice.
The thing about autobiographies is that it's kind of an asshole thing to do. I realize that writing that sentence in my goddamn blog is really hypocritical but there's a huge difference between some twit writing about the O.C. on the internet and someone who has published a real live book. Honestly I think most people have lead interesting lives and their stories are probably really good but when I was looking at the little autobiography section they had set up all I could think about was how little I wanted to know about any of these people trying to tell me to pay for the privelege of telling me about themselves.
Anyway looking for novels stresses me out so I got Russell Brand's autobiography and it's really good. It's written in colloquial British and it turns out he's actually a really good writer, and has led a hell of an interesting life. I've been devouring the thing, I've read 226 pages since yesterday morning when I got it. I love UK slang with a burning passion, and also there's lots of unbelievable stories and a tutor sticking his finger up Russell's bum when he got an answer right so he stopped going. Being engrossed in the language is taking its toll, last night I started thinking in goddamn British before I fell asleep.
It makes me feel terribly boring though, not necessarily because I don't do heroin (although let's be honest how interesting would that make me in context) but because I'd love to have people paying to read about me but I don't think an entire chapter on how I get debilitatingly nervous in the self-checkout line when someone is behind me is really something people are going to pay money for.
I've had about a thousand things that I thought would make excellent blog posts but I can't remember most of them. I see where a twitter-like thing on my phone would be useful in these cases but I don't think people are going to read four paragraph twits on how I find my American and European sensibilities in constant combat, and probably it only lets you type a few lines at a time anyway.
Here is part of a conversation that describes where I am and what I did today:
davidlinc1: where are you like miami
Suppai no Iruka: New Port Richey
Suppai no Iruka: It's near Tampa
davidlinc1: that sounds maine-y
Suppai no Iruka: And Tarpon Springs, where the first Greeks came to america to fish for sponges
Suppai no Iruka: That's not even a little bit a joke
davidlinc1: wow
Suppai no Iruka: The place is fucking crazy with sponges
davidlinc1: well what use DON'T greeks have for sea sponge
Suppai no Iruka: Like A: anyone uses natural sponges
Suppai no Iruka: And B: anyone wants them associated with our fucking culture
Suppai no Iruka: Also we went to disney toda
Suppai no Iruka: well Epcot
Suppai no Iruka: Disney's geeky older brother
davidlinc1: LOL
Suppai no Iruka: He's in college and he's gonna have a great career but
Suppai no Iruka: You're already getting more sex than him and you're in 8th grade
davidlinc1: LOOOOOOL
Suppai no Iruka: Actually it was pretty sweet
Suppai no Iruka: I saw Snow White in Germany
Suppai no Iruka: so
davidlinc1: snow white in ger-
Suppai no Iruka: Yeah
davidlinc1: what
Suppai no Iruka: I was eating bratwurst at the time
davidlinc1: I love bratwurst
davidlinc1: where they take a brat
davidlinc1: then cook the worst of it
davidlinc1: and the brat learns to be good
davidlinc1: .......................................
Actually I should apologize to this young girl, she kept screaming that Snow White was there but I couldn't damn well see her and it's dangerous for princesses to be walking out in the open that far from the Magic Kingdom so I dismissed her and while I didn't think anything particularly rude at her she was totally right and I was wrong and apparently blind but I had been up for like 6 hours and hadn't yet eaten.
Also I have to say Disney is a place where you can open your eyes and at any moment at all pick out the happiest and most depressed children in the world. It's kind of disconcerting how many miserable kids I noticed, even in proportion to all the families making magic memories and stuff.
Well there you are, readers, and that's a post you can take to the goddamn bank, although I don't know that they'll actually give you anything for it. Right now it's roughly four thousand degrees and I am listening to a bloc party song on repeat and wondering if I should work on this story I started last night, the second set of drawings I've not even started on, or sleep even though it's only 12:30 and I slept for like 3 hours this afternoon.
I hope you're all doing well, and I shall be back on Thursday for any of you that wish to, as the kids are saying, "hit me up."
NOW BONCE OFF YA LITTLE WANKAH
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Lesson of the Week
If you make a post on an internet forum saying you'll draw stuff for people, they will come.
I did this on Sunday. Since then I have gotten exactly 21 requests, of which I have done 10 over the past four days, plus the one that inspired me to offer drawings to people.
Normally my drawings are something I do for the hell of it, something I'm not serious about. However, over the last four days my art has improved immeasurably. Having people waiting on my drawings, and five forum pages of people singing my praises and gushing over things I made have levelled me up to an unheard of degree.
So, because I think some of you might like to see what I've been doing all week, I'll post the first half. I've averaged about three a day, with none yesterday for whatever reason.
These were all done based on original characters which people provided references for. I took liberties where I felt I needed to, and did them completely using my tablet and photoshop (which made coloring SO easy).
Enjoy!
I did this on Sunday. Since then I have gotten exactly 21 requests, of which I have done 10 over the past four days, plus the one that inspired me to offer drawings to people.
Normally my drawings are something I do for the hell of it, something I'm not serious about. However, over the last four days my art has improved immeasurably. Having people waiting on my drawings, and five forum pages of people singing my praises and gushing over things I made have levelled me up to an unheard of degree.
So, because I think some of you might like to see what I've been doing all week, I'll post the first half. I've averaged about three a day, with none yesterday for whatever reason.
These were all done based on original characters which people provided references for. I took liberties where I felt I needed to, and did them completely using my tablet and photoshop (which made coloring SO easy).
Enjoy!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
